The Shotgun Rules
version 1.1

The rules listed below apply to the calling of Shotgun (the passengerseat) in an automobile. These rules are definitive and binding.

Section I
The Basic Rules

1. In order to call Shotgun, the caller must pronounce the word"Shotgun" in a clear voice. This call must be heard and acknowledged bythe driver. The other occupants of the vehicle need not hear the callas long as the driver verifies the call.
   
2. Shotgun may only be called if all occupants of the vehicle areoutside and on the way to said vehicle.
   
3. The driver has final say in all ties and disputes. The driver hasthe right to suspend or remove all shotgun privileges from one or morepersons.

Section II
Special Cases

These special exceptions to the rules above should be considered in theorder presented; the case listed first will take precedence over any ofthe cases beneath it, when applicable.

1. In the instance that the normal driver of a vehicle is drunk orotherwise unable to perform their duties as driver, then he/she isautomatically given Shotgun.
   
2. If the instance that the person who actually owns the vehicle is notdriving, then he/she is automatically given Shotgun, unless theydecline.
   
3. In the instance the the driver's spouse, lover, partner, or hiredprostitute for the evening is going to accompany the group, he/she isautomatically given Shotgun, unless they decline.
   
4. In the instance that one of the passengers may become so ill duringthe course of the journey that the other occupants feel he/she will tosstheir cookies, then the ill person should be given Shotgun to makeappropriate use of the window.
   
5. In the instance that only one person knows how to get to a givenlocation and this person is not the driver, then as the designatednavigator for the group they automatically get Shotgun, unless theydecline.
   
6. In the instance that one of the occupants is too wide or tall to fitcomfortably in the back seat, then the driver may show mercy and awardShotgun to the genetic misfit. Alternatively, the driver and otherpassengers may continually taunt the poor fellow as they make a threehour trip with him crammed in the back.

Section III
The Survival of the Fittest Rule

1. If the driver so wishes, he/she may institute the Survival of theFittest Rule on the process of calling Shotgun. In this case all rules,excepting I-4, are suspended and the passenger seat is occupied bywhoever can take it by force.
   
2. The driver must announce the institution of the Survival of theFittest Rule with reasonable warning to all passengers. This clausereduces the amount of blood lost by passengers and the damage done tothe vehicle.

Please follow the above rules to the best of your ability.

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