Are You Computer Illiterate?
So you think you're computer-illiterate? Check out the followingexcerpts from a Wall St. Journal article by Jim Carlton:
Compaq is considering changing the command"Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls askingwhere the "Any" key is.
AST tech support had a caller complaining that hermouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out tobe the plastic shipping bag.
Another Compaq technician received a call from a mancomplaining that the system wouldn't read word-processing files from hisold diskettes. After trouble-shooting eliminated magnets and heat as thecause, it was found that the customer stuck the labels on the diskettes,then rolled the disks into the typewriter to type the labels
Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of herdefective diskettes. A few days later, a letter arrived with Xeroxed copiesof the floppies.
A Dell technician advised his customer to put histroubled floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer askedthe tech to hold on, and was heard putting the phone down, getting up, andclosing the door to his room.
Another Dell customer phoned to say that he couldn'tget his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, thetechnician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holdingit in front of the monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.
Yet another Dell customer called to complain thathis keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned it -- by filling up his tubwith soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then removing allthe keys and washing them individually.
Another Dell technician received a call from a customerwho was enraged because his computer had told him he was "bad and an invalid."The tech explained that the computer's "bad command" and "invalid" responsesshouldn't be taken personally.
An exasperated caller told Dell Computer Tech Supportshe couldn't get her new Dell computer to turn on no matter how hard shepushed on the foot pedal. The "foot pedal" happened to be the mouse.
True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp:
Caller: Hello, is this tech support?
Tech: yes it is. How may I help you?
C: The cup holder on my PC is broken, and I am within my warranty period.How do I go about getting it fixed?
T: I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?
C: Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer.
T: Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped. It's because I am. Did you receivethis as part of a promotional at a trade show? How did you get the cup holder?Does it have any trademark on it?
C: It came with my computer. I don't know anything about a promotional. Itjust pops out when you push the button, and it has "4X4" written on it.
At this point, the tech had to mute the call because he couldn't hold backthe laugh -- the caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM driveas a cup holder, and had snapped it off.
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